Confused

What if the american dream isn't the dream I'm suppose to dream? 

I'm in a little bit of life crisis right now.  I don't know what I want to do with my life. I really don't have any idea.

I'm going back to Sweden for christmas and it's gonna be really nice to see everyone again and to be able to see Kalle Ankas Jul, the highlight of the year. 

But what happens in January? Should I go back to the states? Maybe I should move to Australia or New Zealand. Or maybe I should become a travel agent on some warm island. Maybe I should go back to school. Study business management in LA or Hawaii. Or should I go to Chicago and study music management in stead?

What do you do when everything feels kinda boring? I need some inspiration!!!

Ok, it actaully is the city that never sleeps

I haven't given you guys an update in very a long time. 

I came here to look for the american dream. Ironically enough I'm now working for MTV again. But this time I'm working for the Danish and the Norwegian channel in stead of the Swedish one. 

I'm co-producing and editing Headbangers Ball from New York. So if you haven't figured it out from previous posts, I moved to NY. 

We just started working on the project and we've experienced a lot of technical issues. The final cut is messing stuff up more than ever. The day before yesterday it made a clip out of sync by 4 seconds when I put it down on the timeline. What the hell is that all about!? Everyone I talked to agreed that is way beyond normal. But when I finally solved that and I wanted to get all the material over to the Stockholm office my internet connection broke down on me, it took me 10 hours just to upload one clip. So I went over to Anki today to finnish the last things on the first show and to upload everything but then her internet crashed. I do believe technology in general is against me. It's like that movie The Happening but with computers... 

Anyway, now its 1.30 am and I'm sitting at the 24/356 Apple store on 5th Av. They have great internet connection, I don't think I've ever seen clips upload so fast. Amazing. 

And despite the late/early hour there are surprisingly many people here. I admit that most of them work here but there are quite a few customers too. Or maybe they're just here mooching of the internet like me.

Saw my first celebrity today

It could've been my second actually but I'm not really sure if I did see the guy from Six Feet Under if he just looked like him. Doesn't really matter now. 

I was on the subway and it was wicked crowded but there was a tiny seat available in front of me. All of the sudden I look up and there she is, Kyra Sedgwick. She kindly looks at me and asks: Do you want that seat? 

After a brief moment of chock I say: No, I'm all good. Do you want to sit?

She says: Well, someone should sit and she pushes her son forward so he can sit down with all of his bags. Then she looks at me again and smiles. 

So despite the brief meeting I could tell that she was a nice person. 

And for all of you who is wondering who the hell Kyra Sedgwick is I can say that she was John Travoltas girlfriend in Phenomenon and she has a new TV-show called The Closer. 

So there. Not only did I see one, I talked to one. 

The city that never sleeps?

It's funny,  NYC is supposed to be the city that never sleeps but on the subway everybody does it. 

It doesn't matter what time of day it is there is always someone asleep. Old, young, man, female. Everyone. 

Some people feel self conscious about it and when they wake up they look rather embarrassed but most people don't care. Like it's the most natural thing. 

The other day I was sitting across from this guy who had two sleeping "beauties" next to him and they were both, funny enough, leaning towards him. You know when you're falling asleep and your muscle decides that your arm should move, that happened several times, no reaction from the sleepers, they just closed their eyes again. Also as they were falling asleep their bodies got more relaxed and they fell onto this poor guy in the middle. I'm sitting there thinking that I'd be highly annoyed if that happened to me and I'd probably get up just as they were leaning against me so that they'd fall into each other. But no, not this guy. He sat there and looked completely peaceful. Because sleeping on the subway here in New York is every persons right. 

Awesome, awesome night

So I went out with my friends the other night. 

We started out at this bar. Very cool bar. Cheap beer and usually very little people. 

After we've given the waitress the idea of bowling we all felt that it was something we wanted to do ourselves. 

I made a bet with my friend that was a lot more drunk that I was that I would beat him. 5 bucks was the bet. I kicked ass the first round. My friend yells out double or nothing and of course I went for it. 

He starts the second round with a strike and I immediately think that he's played me. 

It pissed me off too. I was really good the second time, I don't actually know if he played me of if he was just more focused. But in the end, I beat him with 2 points. I've never been so proud in my life. Damn that felt good!

After that we were hanging out in a park and the cop came to visit. This usually happens when my friend Shawn is around. We don't really know why that's just the way it is. 

They asked for all our id's and right away they asked me why I didn't have an american id.

"Uhm....'cause I'm Swedish?"

Anyway, they took a good look and then they decided that we weren't any trouble and they "let us go". The police here must be really bored. But I guess that's a good thing. 

If music makes you feel this way, who needs love??

It's almost like falling in love. Your body starts creating endorphins, you get goose bumps, your chest get filled up with so much joy it almost feel like you can't fit anything else in there. It's expanding so much you think it is going to explode. A smile on your face, you're laughing, maybe even jumping around. It's so simple but we forget sometimes, or I do at least. 

Music. 

"Well I guess it just suggests, that this is just what happiness is" - Mr Az

Music and movies, my two favorite things

Yesterday I went to Rockwood Musichall and saw three different bands. The venue was about as big as a small livingroom which makes the whole thing a lot more intimate and often in my opinion, a lot better. 

All three bands were all really good but one of them blew me away! Have you ever been to one of those gigs where it's just you and the music? Nothing else exists around you and you're head is filled with fluffy things and it's like you're floating. That is called love and this time it was love at first sight. The band was called Casey Shea Band. Check out their Myspace and while you're in there you might as well check out Jeff Taylor from New Jersey, also really good. Although, that's a guy that should be seen in person. What a character.  Let's just say he was like a boy with ADD and tourette's. 

Today I went to see Nick and Norah's infinite playlist. I've been longing to see that movie and now I know why. It was really really good. It has the same feel to it as Juno. So if you liked Juno you'll like this one. 

Tonight, I'm falling asleep with a smile on my face. Good tunes in my head and great pictures to go along with it. 

Too long under ground will do the trick

We had a great night yesterday. I got my meatballs and I know sill and vasterbotten cheese was had at the table. Amazing Swedish food at a restaurant where it said Baltic Food on the sign on the front door. Oh well, no need to be picky I guess. 

After dinner we went to a club in West Village I think where a girl, probably no older than 16, wasn't let in because she had coke in her purse. Only in NYC. 

When we were heading home it took us forever to find the right subway station, when we finally did it turned out we had to walk like 10 miles under ground just to get to the right platform. 

If I wasn't sober enough when we started walking that definitely killed my buzz. 

Back in the big apple

I'm back. Left New Hampshire at 3.45 am yesterday morning and came to the city around noon. 

Strangely I wasn't that tired at all but last night when I got a bit tipsy after only a couple of beers I realized I was probably more beat than I thought.

Yesterday I hung out with some old co-workers of mine. We had a great time and after talking to them I once again realized; this is the city I want to live in, I need to live here. 

At the moment that's not possible so I tried to not think about it.

Today the sun is shining and it's 75 degrees (ca 23) outside, needless to say it's an amazing day. My friend Gabbi and I went down to the financial district, sat by the water and ejoyed our day. I got sunburned during the time we were there. It's October! You're not suppose to get sunburned in October. And then again, the forbidden thought entered my mind: I WANT TO LIVE HERE!!! So now I'm going to make that happen. One way or another. 

Tonight we're going out to celebrate Gabbis birthday. We're going to a place where they serve Swedish food. Meatballs, mashed potatoes and lingonberries...YUM! I might have to stay away from the beer though....

It's cool man

Jag borjade kanna mig lite seg och trott. 

Sitter pa det har fiket idag igen eftersom att internet vagrar funka for mig i lagenheten.

Hur som, jag behovde nat som fick igang mig igen. 

Adam Tensta - My Cool!!!

Funkar. Varje gang. 

Dagens i-landsproblem mina damer och herrar.

So my internet died this morning. 

Don't know what happened. I tried for a couple of hours to fix it with no luck. I'm just just not that smart when it comes to technical stuff. I just bought a new computer. It's a macbook. It's white and it's beautiful! But I don't know shit about these things. I have to call my friend in Sweden every time a complication occur. Very annoying and I'm sure he feels the same way. 

Anyway, after a while I remembered that there's a coffee shop across the street with WiFi. 

Awesome! So that's where I am right now but they close in like an hour. This is very stressful. I'm on the internet all the time. As soon as I walk in through the door I open up my laptop and enjoy the variety of amusement the world wide web can provide and now I can  only do that for a limited time. I know it sounds trivial but my window to the outside world has been taken away from me.  

I can't spend more time on this, I need to use my time wisely. 

Today

Today, is one of those days. 

I had a great day with one of my best friends Beth. We did some shopping and we had a really good time. 

But still this feeling won't leave me. I miss....everything. Him, her, that. 

I just miss it. 

Pancakes and laundry

Sorry I haven't written in a while. 

Not much has happened since last time though. I'm back from NYC. 

Since I got back I've been getting in touch with some old friends which has been awesome. 

It's weird when you've been away from someone for so long but once you get together it's like you've always been there. I love that feeling. 

Today I made pancakes for the first time ever. I mean american pancakes. Other than that I've been cleaning the kitchen and doing laundry... 

I wonder if this makes me free as a bird, considering it's a Monday and all or if it just makes me into a housewife?  

D-day +1

Ok. So I walked in to the building where The Onions office were. I go up to the second floor and I immediately feel like I've walked in to someone' s apartment. After a little while a find a door where it says The Onion. Every other offire on this floor had a glass door except for the one I was knocking on..of course.. It was big and heavy and I wasn't at all sure if it was even possible to hear the knock. Anywho,  this young guy opens the door. I go: Hi, my name is Elisabeth, I'm actually looking for a job, this is my resume and I'd like to give it to you. Or is there someone else I can talk to?

He looks at me with a big question mark on his forehead and goes: This is actually the sales department, unless you want a job here maybe you should go down to editorial? 

Liz: uhm, yeah. That might be a good idea. Where's that exactly?

So I thanked him for the directions and walked away.. That's when a girl from the same office comes running after me and like: Don't go down to the other office! They hate when people do that!

Luckily she gave me an e-mail address where I should send me resume. So at least something good came out of this weird visit. 

So I'm sending them my resume tomorrow followed by a kick-ass letter. They won't be able to resist me. 

D-day

So tomorrow is the day when I'm going to walk in to my future employers office and basically just ask them for a job. It's going to be very interesting. 

I figure one of two things will happen. Either they'll be impressed of my ballsiness and hire me or they'll think I'm a freak and send me on my way and I've burned all bridges... I don't have to tell you which one I prefer. 

So at some point during they day tomorrow, send me happy and wishful thoughts. 

Not my cup of balls

Hey y'all!

So I'm in NYC at the moment. Just came back from a Yankees game. It was really fun at the beginning but it got kinda boring towards the end... There's not happening at a baseball game. I love hockey. It's fast paced and very hard core. Not at all like baseball. I know it's stupid to compare the two but still... When I go to see a sport I'd like to see some action. But don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the game tonight, it's just simply not my first choice of sport. 

 

The answear to every disease is spelled: AC

What is up with Americans and their stupid AC?? I mean I understand that you want to keep your home, store, coffee shop or whatever cool during the summer. But does it have to be freezing? And it's not summer anymore! I've been here for about a week now and I'm already sick. I have this terrible cold. It's better today though which is good 'cause I'm in NY and it's a pain in the ass to be sick in NY. All the people and the warm air, crazy (even more than in NH) AC that they have everywhere and the subway that's just weird.. It feels like you're gonna die from over heating when you get down there but as soon as you enter the train it's like you just entered a freezer... 

Hemlangtan is a tricky thing..

Den har gangen blir bloggen pa svenska. Jag ber om ursakt att den maste skrivas utan prickar men jag har inte sa mycket annat val liksom... 

Idag har jag lite hemlangtan. Vilket ar konstigt. Eller konstigt och konstigt. Jag vet ju att jag inte skulle vilja va i Sverige egentligen. Jag ar pa ratt stalle men paniken ar enorm idag. 

Det ar forsta gangen jag ar helt sjalv och det gor att man har tid att tanka. Man ska inte tanka nar man gor sanna har grejer. Det tar pa en som fan. Med sanna har grejer sa menar jag saklart att flytta utomlands helt sjalv utan att ha nagot jobb. 

Men det ar sant har som gor att man vaxer eller hur? 

Onions make you cry... out of joy

So, I don 't know of I've been clear enough, but I'm here to chase dreams. A dream. Or even maybe THE dream. If you would've asked me a couple of years ago I would've said that my dream job is to work for MTV and producing the MTV Movie Awards or something. At least one of the big award shows they host every year but I think my my dream has changed. My new dream is The Onion. Ever heard of?

Highly recommend it. theonion.com

That's where I'll be. Soon. 

I'm beat and I still don't speak Spanishn

OK, first day at work went well. 

I'm so tired though. So many new faces, so many new spanish words.. 

I think I might have been the only blonde girl there all night long. I'm definitely the only one not speaking spanish among the employees. 

But I have to say one thing, it's so easy to work in the service business in the states. Everybody is so darn nice. All the time! Amazing. I know it's fake and all most of the time but still. 

I worked at McDonalds once in Sweden and  I'll take fake people over grumpy, irritated parents with hungry annoying kids any day of the week. 

Time to go to work...

Soon I'm heading in to work.. 

It feels weird. Me working in the states. 

I'm sure it will be fun though. I will make sure it will. 

Sandra Lee

When we'e bored around here we either watch the weather channel or the food network. 

I like the food network. It's fun but there is one disturbing thing about it. Her name is Sandra Lee. Sandra Lee is like Bree Van Der Kamp but without the attitude. Miss Dee, I mean Lee is just scary. She always have a theme on her show and then everything is in that theme. Her clothes, her kitchen, the curtains in the background and of course her table settings. My my... 

If you ever get a chance you should check her out. 

I will definitely tune in for Halloween, we all ned a good scare then. 

Give a little...

Alright... 

My name is Elisabeth. I just sold everything I own basically and moved to the states, I think my goal is to achieve the american dream. 

I was just debating with my friend (born and raised american) what exactly the american dream is. I think we came to the conclusion of it being the idea of freedom. Or wait, I meant to achieve actual freedom. So I guess that's what I'm doing here. 

Oh yeah, I might have to mention that I'm from Stockholm, Sweden and I'm currently living in Derry, New Hampshire. 

This is my third day here in  the states and tomorrow I'm already starting a new job. It's kinda low key, paid in cash and not at all the job of my dreams but we all know that we have to give a little to get a little.