Confused

What if the american dream isn't the dream I'm suppose to dream? 

I'm in a little bit of life crisis right now.  I don't know what I want to do with my life. I really don't have any idea.

I'm going back to Sweden for christmas and it's gonna be really nice to see everyone again and to be able to see Kalle Ankas Jul, the highlight of the year. 

But what happens in January? Should I go back to the states? Maybe I should move to Australia or New Zealand. Or maybe I should become a travel agent on some warm island. Maybe I should go back to school. Study business management in LA or Hawaii. Or should I go to Chicago and study music management in stead?

What do you do when everything feels kinda boring? I need some inspiration!!!

Ok, it actaully is the city that never sleeps

I haven't given you guys an update in very a long time. 

I came here to look for the american dream. Ironically enough I'm now working for MTV again. But this time I'm working for the Danish and the Norwegian channel in stead of the Swedish one. 

I'm co-producing and editing Headbangers Ball from New York. So if you haven't figured it out from previous posts, I moved to NY. 

We just started working on the project and we've experienced a lot of technical issues. The final cut is messing stuff up more than ever. The day before yesterday it made a clip out of sync by 4 seconds when I put it down on the timeline. What the hell is that all about!? Everyone I talked to agreed that is way beyond normal. But when I finally solved that and I wanted to get all the material over to the Stockholm office my internet connection broke down on me, it took me 10 hours just to upload one clip. So I went over to Anki today to finnish the last things on the first show and to upload everything but then her internet crashed. I do believe technology in general is against me. It's like that movie The Happening but with computers... 

Anyway, now its 1.30 am and I'm sitting at the 24/356 Apple store on 5th Av. They have great internet connection, I don't think I've ever seen clips upload so fast. Amazing. 

And despite the late/early hour there are surprisingly many people here. I admit that most of them work here but there are quite a few customers too. Or maybe they're just here mooching of the internet like me.

Saw my first celebrity today

It could've been my second actually but I'm not really sure if I did see the guy from Six Feet Under if he just looked like him. Doesn't really matter now. 

I was on the subway and it was wicked crowded but there was a tiny seat available in front of me. All of the sudden I look up and there she is, Kyra Sedgwick. She kindly looks at me and asks: Do you want that seat? 

After a brief moment of chock I say: No, I'm all good. Do you want to sit?

She says: Well, someone should sit and she pushes her son forward so he can sit down with all of his bags. Then she looks at me again and smiles. 

So despite the brief meeting I could tell that she was a nice person. 

And for all of you who is wondering who the hell Kyra Sedgwick is I can say that she was John Travoltas girlfriend in Phenomenon and she has a new TV-show called The Closer. 

So there. Not only did I see one, I talked to one. 

The city that never sleeps?

It's funny,  NYC is supposed to be the city that never sleeps but on the subway everybody does it. 

It doesn't matter what time of day it is there is always someone asleep. Old, young, man, female. Everyone. 

Some people feel self conscious about it and when they wake up they look rather embarrassed but most people don't care. Like it's the most natural thing. 

The other day I was sitting across from this guy who had two sleeping "beauties" next to him and they were both, funny enough, leaning towards him. You know when you're falling asleep and your muscle decides that your arm should move, that happened several times, no reaction from the sleepers, they just closed their eyes again. Also as they were falling asleep their bodies got more relaxed and they fell onto this poor guy in the middle. I'm sitting there thinking that I'd be highly annoyed if that happened to me and I'd probably get up just as they were leaning against me so that they'd fall into each other. But no, not this guy. He sat there and looked completely peaceful. Because sleeping on the subway here in New York is every persons right. 

Awesome, awesome night

So I went out with my friends the other night. 

We started out at this bar. Very cool bar. Cheap beer and usually very little people. 

After we've given the waitress the idea of bowling we all felt that it was something we wanted to do ourselves. 

I made a bet with my friend that was a lot more drunk that I was that I would beat him. 5 bucks was the bet. I kicked ass the first round. My friend yells out double or nothing and of course I went for it. 

He starts the second round with a strike and I immediately think that he's played me. 

It pissed me off too. I was really good the second time, I don't actually know if he played me of if he was just more focused. But in the end, I beat him with 2 points. I've never been so proud in my life. Damn that felt good!

After that we were hanging out in a park and the cop came to visit. This usually happens when my friend Shawn is around. We don't really know why that's just the way it is. 

They asked for all our id's and right away they asked me why I didn't have an american id.

"Uhm....'cause I'm Swedish?"

Anyway, they took a good look and then they decided that we weren't any trouble and they "let us go". The police here must be really bored. But I guess that's a good thing. 

If music makes you feel this way, who needs love??

It's almost like falling in love. Your body starts creating endorphins, you get goose bumps, your chest get filled up with so much joy it almost feel like you can't fit anything else in there. It's expanding so much you think it is going to explode. A smile on your face, you're laughing, maybe even jumping around. It's so simple but we forget sometimes, or I do at least. 

Music. 

"Well I guess it just suggests, that this is just what happiness is" - Mr Az

Music and movies, my two favorite things

Yesterday I went to Rockwood Musichall and saw three different bands. The venue was about as big as a small livingroom which makes the whole thing a lot more intimate and often in my opinion, a lot better. 

All three bands were all really good but one of them blew me away! Have you ever been to one of those gigs where it's just you and the music? Nothing else exists around you and you're head is filled with fluffy things and it's like you're floating. That is called love and this time it was love at first sight. The band was called Casey Shea Band. Check out their Myspace and while you're in there you might as well check out Jeff Taylor from New Jersey, also really good. Although, that's a guy that should be seen in person. What a character.  Let's just say he was like a boy with ADD and tourette's. 

Today I went to see Nick and Norah's infinite playlist. I've been longing to see that movie and now I know why. It was really really good. It has the same feel to it as Juno. So if you liked Juno you'll like this one. 

Tonight, I'm falling asleep with a smile on my face. Good tunes in my head and great pictures to go along with it.